Can You Tell I Don't Want to Job Search?

I was watching the music video for "Gonna Get Over You" by Sara Bareilles on YouTube and an ad popped up asking if I needed an artificial hip replacement. If you were to make a Venn diagram of people who need artificial hips and people who listen to Sara Bareilles, I'm fairly certain the overlap would be nonexistent.

I got new running shoes about a week ago. I've always been sensitive about my gigantic feet and my pride took an especially big hit when the Brooks outlet didn't carry the shoes I wanted as big as I wanted them. Much to my dismay, I was forced to purchase men's shoes. This humiliation was quickly erased yesterday morning, however, when I discovered that printed on the tongues of my new shoes, in all caps, are the words "THE BEAST." Best shoes ever.

Remember my stunning display of intelligence the other day when I tried to no avail to locate "tomatillo" in the English section of my Spanish-English dictionary? Well, today I was flipping through and happened upon "sombrero." In the English section. How does that make sense?

You may have noticed that one of my blog post labels is "Stupid Things I Have Done." I thought when I created it that it would help me organize my posts into easily locatable categories, but really all it's done is help me realize that every single thing I do is stupid. I should start tagging posts that showcase all the times I could have done something stupid but didn't. What it must be like to experience such a moment.

I'm currently perusing Craigslist for part-time jobs. Here is a smattering of what I've found so far this morning, in the span of about seven minutes:

1. A job coaching soccer with an organization called Kidz Love Soccer. Their motto is "Where the score is always Fun to Fun!" And it's trademarked. Unfortunately for them, spelling "kids" correctly is, evidently, also trademarked.

2. A part-time cleaner at Yogurtland. That sounds magical.

3. Promo girls for Seattle's newest night club. The first two requirements are that you "know how to PARTY" and "have lots of friends on Twitter and Facebook." Well, my idea of a PARTY is making popcorn and watching While You Were Sleeping four times in a row, I don't have a Twitter account, and the majority of my eight Facebook friends are former professors. So basically, this job was tailor-made for me.

That's it for now. Don't be too disappointed, though - I'm sure as soon as I leave my seat at the computer I'll do something else idiotic on accident.